(Photo obviously altered, original from www.wallconvert.com)
Beware the full moon. It's not only a caution to enemies or prey of the werewolf. It's also caution to men. The other afternoon while I was talking with my husband, he randomly gasped in realization of something and seemed quite amused. I asked him, "What??" and he said "You know what I just realized?" Next, he proceeded to pull up a website that showed the frequency a full moon takes place. With goofy yet respectful glee he pointed out the hilarity of his realization. The full moon comes out about every 29 days. A woman starts a special monthly cycle about every 28 days. Coincidence? Maybe it was the post-stomach flu or pre-finals brain fog that made it so funny, but considering the implications of this imperfect coincidence, we laughed and laughed and laughed (stifling as best as we could so we wouldn't wake Lucy from her nap). Sam of course followed up by assuring me he was being silly, and asked to make sure he hadn't hurt my feelings, which of course he hadn't. I thought it was goofy and hilarious. OH! how I love my husband. :)
I've since devised a werewoman survival plan should you ever encounter one:
1.) Werewomen—especially ones at a heightened stage of emotion—can be difficult to decipher. If her emotions are contentious, it is best to stand at a safe distance away. However, take note that if her heightened emotions have been provoked by a cause other than you, holding her tight and not letting go for at least several seconds may be a better choice. This should instantly calm her slightly if not significantly.
2.) There are a several ways to pacify and even tame a werewoman. These include but are not limited to: chocolate, ice cream, chocolate ice cream, back and foot massages, favorite snacks and comfort foods, plumpery pillows, suggestions to go lie down and read for fun, compliance with pleas to watch any or all Jane Austen-inspired movies, spontaneous compliments on messy bun or PJ sweats attire, or any combination of the aforementioned methods.
3.) Remember this phenomenon is not permanent nor is it constant. Your werewoman will soon be restored to a safer, more normal state.
